Seize the day: Archive

I don't ever know where to begin... I feel so lost

Jan 12th

I want to make love, not have sex.

FML. I will never find someone who loves me, and I’ll never be able to make love. For the rest of my life I’ll be used as a sex machine…

Dec 26th

Forreall doeeeee…..

Dec 26th

Merry Xmas

I got the tip from Pp, except for the fact that he lasts so long in bed… that neither he nor I got to orgasm; which isn’t surprising for me since I NEVER get to reach my orgasm. But man, he put in some work… yea he didn’t like the condoms tho… ma bad… looks like birth control for me! Meh :/ Well at least I got a nice present for Christmas, thanks Santa!

Dec 26th

I'm not a prostitute,

ok really? Have some fucking respect at least, I came over to your house, you can at least offer me a ride home after fucking you. I’ve had to walk home 4 times before, like the fuck really. Douchebags these days.

Dec 26th

Watch

celestevictoria: m-ezmorized: CUTEST COUPLE EVER <3 I love em! thats my aunt&her boyfriend duncan. LOLOLOL~<3 They’re honestly the cutest, I want their love!

Dec 25th

22 notes

Dec 25th

Damn...

It’s been forever since I posted something but anyways as an update… It’s Christmas Eve! I just came back from Leahs house, her family threw a Xmas party and they were kind enough to invite me, I love spending time with her fam bam. But… Last night I did the unthinkable… with someone I shouldn’t have… uh oh uh oh…… But last week I did the...

Dec 25th

They help me forget about the pain

LOVE THEM<3 GET BUCK!

Nov 13th

Nov 7th

I’m slowly losing it, I don’t have the energy to even try to do any school work I don’t have the energy to even try to improve in volleyball, there you go lil bitch, you got my starting spot but whatevs since seasons over anyways. All I can think about is how foolish I was to make such a big mistake with him. I miss him. And now he’s with someone else. Jealousy has...

Nov 7th

Nov 2nd

I'm over it.

Nov 2nd

Nov 1st

Wholly dude, Wholly?

It took her like what… 3-4 weeks for her to get in a relationship with you… And it took me 7 months to try… but get fucked over by you multiple times… That’s cool tho.

Nov 1st

OK....

I need to cool down, tonight it was pretty crazy. My girls and I got pretty heated… some bitch is about to get fucked up if she can’t keep her mouth shut. Aside that, it’s great knowing how bitches enjoy putting their shit out there on facebook. Hope you had fun riding his dick…

Oct 31st

I’M ABOUT TO BUST A CAP IN YO ASS. WATCH YOUR BACK BITCH, YOU AINT GETTING AWAY WITH ALL THAT SHIT YOU’RE A DUMB BITCH, FO REAL THO. I’M STUPID? YOU’RE STUPID… SUCK A NUT HELL FUCKING YEA, LEAH AND I ARE ABOUT JUMP ON YO ASS. FO REAL THO…. HELL YEA I’M ABOUT TO SLAP A BITCH I hope she fucking bleeds to death from stabbing herself...

Oct 31st

Oct 30th

Off the scaless :/

Preach it. Lately my mom has been bothering my about my weight and how it makes me look bad. It’s really been making me self conscious. She’s trying to put me on a diet and cut off all the foods that aren’t even bad for me. But I hate it when she makes me feel like a fat lard, she’s always reminding me about how I’ve gained weight. While I was in Thailand, her...

Oct 30th

38,683 notes

So exhausted...

Woke up at 6 a.m. and had a tournament all the way in sun valley till 7 p.m. Got food poisoned and had the hugest migraine of my life through out the day… not the business. -__- Went to a cracked out party so not exactly the weekend I was looking forward too :( And logged onto facebook with some exciting news… LOLZ NOT. I miss him, and I know I can’t have him. Gonna go cry...

Oct 30th

FINALLY!

The week is over! I’m done with my AP US History essay and quiz AND my math test. I probably have only gotten 18 hours of sleep this week… no bueno. AND to think I’d be catching up on sleep this weekend… Nooo… I have a tournament tomorrow at 6 AM… FML… But at least I got my costume, I was going to be a lifeguard but I couldn’t find anything so I got...

Oct 29th

Eh,..

decent day :/

Oct 27th

Goodnight moon! ☽

Favorite book when I was a child <3

Oct 26th

I can tell this is going to be a crappy week...

Oct 26th

142 notes

Oct 26th

I'm not good enough,

I wish I was good enough… I’ve tried to be good enough for him… MEH.

Oct 26th

Yea...

I’m done… there’s no point. I’m just wasting my time.

Oct 26th

Night ;O

So tired, didn’t do any homework… to lazy to do homework… to lazy to procrastinate… I’m just a high school fuck up :/ Meh night :)

Oct 25th

Mhm.

Mhm bitches be on my sack lately. Got some trust issues with em orange brows.

Oct 25th

16 notes

Best fwenzz

You can say that we’re a little troubled. But spending time with them always make me happy<3

Oct 25th

Nap time clears my mind :)

Oct 25th

77 notes

Meh Meh Meh

So last night he texted me to hang out with his cousin…lol what… but basically I told him about how much of a dick he’s been and that I’m mad at him ugh -__- as much as I wanted to just let it go I knew I had to stand my ground. I like him so much it sucks, but I’m sure he’ll never feel that way. Today I ran into him, we walked together towards the gym… we...

Oct 25th

Watch

She never fails to make me laugh or smile. I love her<3

Oct 24th

It kills me everytime

when somebody asks me if I’m okay and I reply that I’m fine with a smile or an excuse when I really don’t feel okay… I want them to know, but I don’t feel like they’ll understand, so I just lie.

Oct 24th

Is it weird that

I want something bad to happen to me. I want to be run over, to be hurt by somebody, to have to go to a hospital. I want to do drugs and smoke and drink, I want to take pills and pass out, I want to bash my head into a mirror and cut my arms up. I want to throw up until my body is finally perfect. Because I hate myself and I want somebody to realize that.

Oct 24th

26 notes

Oct 24th

35 notes

Oct 24th

180 notes

Belated Birthday

So last week was my birthday, I FINALLY turned 16 :) Turning 16 is sorta considered a big thing, I mean why else do girls throw sweet 16’s? However my parents failed to do anything for my birthday, I know it sounds selfish but aren’t you supposed to feel special on your birthday? I didn’t feel special at all. My mom decided to make plans over my birthday by taking part in some 3...

Oct 24th

6 months later...

small talk now, he’s still mad at me tho. I still like him tho… a lot

Oct 24th

5 months later...

and I still haven’t gotten over him…

Sep 28th

Vacation

…lol I get no vacation… why? Because I decided to be a dumb fuck and go out with my friends. I could be going to Thailand for 3 weeks in a a week and a half but nope… I’m staying home grounded while my mum and best friend go to Thailand. Fuck my life. I’ve been planning this trip with my family for the past month. At least my mom will get to relax for a couple of...

Jul 8th

SO...

It’s been about a month since I last blogged here. And it was about Jerm and how I had lost my virginity to this twat. Basically I think he just hit it and quit it with me, lovely. Because as I predicted, I did get attached, I tried not to… but I still did. And now I’m a miserable little fuck because we rarely talk as much and I’m always meaning to ask him whether we were...

May 22nd

SEX...

I’ve only been talking to this guy for a while and I lost my virginity to him. I mean I had a crush on him and all but fuck… that was not enough for me to just lose it to him. I’m terribly ashamed of myself right now, I thought I was smarter than that. Especially since I may get attached… and fuck I really don’t need that. If I get attached, I’ll just end up...

Apr 21st